Disciple: You?

We all want to be loved. Love is the ultimate expression of relationship, and more than anything else, we were created to be in relationship. This became so clear to me when I was pondering about being a disciple of Jesus.

When our spirit comes alive (Romans 8:10), we can see the truth that we are made in the image and likeness of God. The purpose for our creation is that we can truly "glorify God and enjoy him forever" (Westminster Shorter Catechism), and to do this we must know who we are in relationship with Him.
 
God is spirit (John 4:24). We also are spiritual beings (1 Corinthians 14:14-15). The spiritual world is real. God is love (1 John 4:8), and we are fully capable of being loving creatures as He is. Trish and my newest grandchild is just eight months old. His name is Elroy which means "God who sees me". Elroy knows love, and, even though we do not see each other very often, I know that he loves me and trusts me completely. I am a great believer that children learn about their world while they are still in their mother's womb; they get to know the voices of the people close to them, and to know if theirs is a peaceful home or one with disagreements, anger and tension. The kinds of music that is played around them has a lifelong effect on the baby; this is why so many musicians' children become musicians themselves, a mix of nature and nurture. 

When I have first met my grandchildren, I have been delighted to see their response when I first speak to them; their eyes may not yet be seeing but their ears can hear and know that my voice is familiar. Thus our relationship is already begun and only grows from there. 

This flows from the Creation; God is family, the first family of Father, Son and Holy Spirit. The apostle Paul tells us that Jesus is "the mystery that has been kept hidden for ages and generations, but is now revealed to the Lord's people" (Colossians 1:26), and this is enough for me. Elroy and I are family just as God and I are family now that I have been made a son (1 John 3:1) as Jesus is a Son (Psalm 2:7; Hebrews 5:5). All this enables us to truly know that we are made in the image and likeness of God Himself (Genesis 1:27).
 
I spend time with recovering addicts, people who were abusive alcohol and drug users, (though happily most have been "clean" for a long time). It is amazing how grateful they are to have been rescued from what they had come to know as "the life", (using these words, "the life", suggests that there is something special about this group of people, that the "normal" rules of society can be suspended for them. It is only when they begin to recover that the addict sees the truth, that they were deluded and causing great pain and harm, particularly to people who love them).
 
Often they will tell that they really gained hope for their recovery when they identified with Father God and His Son Jesus who they now know as their Saviour. It is in identifying with Jesus, (not simply that they have received salvation), that they begin to know who they really are and their value and their potential, and that they are worth saving because they were given life by and for this same Jesus (Colossians 1:16) who came and rescued them, and even now continues to rescue them daily (Hebrews 7:25).
 
Disciples
 
Here we see the beginnings of discipleship: "Jesus said to them, 'Follow me, and I will make you fishers of men'" (Matthew 4:19). Discipleship can be said to comprise three elements: Jesus' call, ("Follow me"), Jesus changing us, ("I will make you"), and Jesus bringing us into participation in His work on the Earth, ("fishers of men”).
 
And then the response of those who became Jesus' twelve disciples: "Immediately they left their nets [or tax booth ..] and followed him" (Matthew 4:20). Later Jesus assured them (and us, each one): "And behold, I am with you always" (Matthew 28:20).
 
Jesus loved His disciples, He taught them about His Father, (now our Father (Matthew 6:9)), and the Kingdom of God (Luke 8:10), and He gave them power (Luke 10:9) and authority (Luke 10:19) to be His voice, His hands and His feet in the world after He went to be with our Father in Heaven (John 14:12-14).
 
Paul wrote about the object of discipleship: "This is how one should regard us, as servants of Christ and stewards of the mysteries of God" (1 Corinthians 4:1). As we learn and apply ourselves we grow as people and as Christians.
 
And we can work this out ".. by the mercies of God, present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable to God, which is your spiritual service. Don’t be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, so that you may prove what is the good, well-pleasing, and perfect will of God" (Romans 12:1-2).
 
The "renewing of our mind" is where discipling can be so helpful. We all have biases and prejudices; a mature Christian walking with us can help us to see these and "renew" so that we come to have a Christian worldview and "the mind of Christ" (1 Corinthians 2:16), and be aware of spiritual truths.
 
Paul was a tireless worker for Jesus, often amidst great difficulties (2 Corinthians 11:16-33). He encourages us: "Be imitators of me, as I am of Christ" (1 Corinthians 11:1); Paul was imitating Jesus who was always ready to do our Father's will (Matthew 8:20; John 15:10).
 
I have a friend who disciples. He is fully committed to Jesus and to serving Him. He leads a house church, is a busy intercessor and disciples a number of people in three Asian countries and here in our city. He travels overseas when he can, otherwise he spends hours at a time in international phone calls. It is truly awesome to see how the disciples have grown over the years; many face incredible difficulties in places violently hostile to Christians yet they maintain their Christian witness faithfully. Awesome. The fruit of a dedicated teacher living for and teaching Jesus (1 Timothy 4:6).
 
We can see that all this is not just Sundays, and it is not just one facet of our life, but rather we become Christian through and through. We truly do "identify with Jesus" (1 Corinthians 12:12; Galatians 2:20; Colossians 3:3; 1 Peter 2:9). Having someone encourage and teach us over a period of years is so precious. 

Ideas
 
I see that much of being discipled in Jesus is that we learn who He is, and who we are, all this with a clear understanding of The Kingdom of God, and of this world, our home, our place that God has made for us.
 
Plato and Aristotle were famous thinkers more than twenty-three centuries ago. They developed two opposing ideas about reality which are still important, and vital that we understand.
 
Plato argued that beyond everything in the world there must be something else, something absolute by which everything else can be measured or tested. Thus ideas and meaning can be known or can be measured against a plumb line (Isaiah 28:17; Amos 7:8) or anchor (Hebrews 6:19). We Christians know this "absolute" to be God, our God who is personal to each one of us, the unchanging and infinite God of all the Creation and Father of our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ (Ephesians 1:3).
 
Aristotle, on the other hand, said that the individual and ideas are the centre, and that there is no final thing for us to relate to, just us and our ideas, ideals and behaviours which change with the fashions and the generations.
 
Ideas that are presently growing in the Western democracies are ideas of humanism (which may sound fine but in reality is a toxic form of religion). A tiny unelected minority of people we do not know have decided that "inclusion", "diversity", and "tolerance" are keys to a perfect world. They have redefined these words from what has been understood for generations. They also decide who may not be included and who has the wrong kind of diversity, and those whose tolerance is unacceptable so are to be shut out and excluded, and may have their career cut short and their reputation destroyed. This is the opposite of God's plan.
 
I have never understood this kind of thinking. I see that humankind are now building a new form of the Tower of Babel (Genesis 11:1-9). People in leadership are destroying our Western democratic cultures to make way for an unknowable future utopian class system ruled by "the state", where those same people will still be the elite who have open access to the wealth and privilege. We saw this in the Soviet Union and Nazi Germany, and in China under Mao and in many African, Asian and South American countries where totalitarianism has been forced on the people, then failed at huge cost in suffering and deaths.
 
Jesus is truth. Discipling will bring biblical truth into its right place in Christian minds and hearts. "Watch your life and doctrine closely. Persevere in them, because if you do, you will save both yourself and your hearers" (1 Timothy 4:16)
 
Today
 
"Mentor" is likely the term we use today for what the Bible calls "disciple". I know some Christians who have been mentored, always over a period of years, and they have been hugely blessed. As they tell of their experience you can see that they have grown to love their mentor, and they know that they are loved by him or her. This has been a deep and rich experience for those few that I have met, they have grown in Christian understanding and in commitment because of the love shown them and the growth they have experienced. 

As I read my Bible I see that discipleship is a theme, especially in the New Testament, with Jesus leading off by commanding us to ".. make disciples of all nations, baptizing them .. and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you" (Matthew 28:19-20). We can see that it would be good were we all disciples, each with a mature Christian teacher and guide, while we, as we grow in Jesus, were drawn to "younger" Christians so we can disciple, or "mentor" them.
 
As I think about all this I see that Trish and I disciple one another, as do the men in the men's group I am delighted to be a part of. As a married couple and as seven caring guys we really do know love; we have seen much answered prayer, healing and growth as Christians and as people. Our group is wonderful; we men arrange our week to be sure to join our Tuesday evening meeting, we meet where we can as circumstances change, this just takes a little determination (and sometimes Internet technology).
 
I notice too that I now come alongside some of my new acquaintances and share something of our Saviour's heart that is particularly for them. Perhaps it is this new form of sharing that has got me thinking about disciples and helping Christians to grow.
 
My own journey has been long, with mostly slow growth. Sometimes in January I would look back over the past year and see just the tiniest improvement, (but praise Jesus, never none at all); I can see now that a discipler or Christian mentor would have been such a treasure to me.
 
Our church structures do not lend themselves to such individual ministry. We have professional pastors who seem to be very busy all the time, administering the programs, services, buildings and infrastructure of the "church" institution they are paid to care for. And the rest of us fit into this scheme of things. As I read my Bible, particularly the final verses of Acts Chapter 2, I cannot see any of a typical pastor's rôles, but rather people living their lives in fellowship with their new-found Jesus at the centre as they one-another one another.
 
In the 1960s and '70s the hippies used to say, "tune in, turn on, drop out". They recognised that the world around them was becoming more and more conformist with poor values. They may have been onto something (even though, to my mind, their direction was wrong). Perhaps we could learn something from them and "drop out" of our 21st century worldly culture and seek life in Jesus and His people.

 
Ask
 
“Whatever you ask in my name, this I will do, that the Father may be glorified in the Son. If you ask me anything in my name, I will do it" (John 14:13-14)."
 
If you believe that discipling would be helpful for you, ask in prayer; our Father wants every one of us to have full understanding and a full life (John 10:10). Also, look to the people around you, ask Jesus to show you a person, then ask him or her would they be prepared to disciple or mentor you. Or, if you are a mature Christian, that He will show you someone you can come alongside and help. Pray that Jesus will guide you and help you. You both will be so enriched!
 
May I also suggest that you do not try to start a program or movement in your local church or denomination. This is Jesus' work; He will help with a one-on-one learning process, unique to each discipler and disciple.
 
Thankfully too, Jesus is always ready to continue His discipling of us, each one. We can always look to Him and His Word, the Bible.
 
Bless you dear Jesus, bless us all. Amen. 

Favourite Bible Verses
 
"If you instruct the brothers of these things, you will be a good servant of Christ Jesus, nourished in the words of the faith, and of the good doctrine which you have followed" (1 Timothy 4:6).
 
"A disciple is not above his teacher, but everyone when he is fully trained will be like his teacher" (Luke 6:40).
 
"A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another. By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another" (John 13:34-35).
 
"They devoted themselves to the apostles' teaching and to fellowship, to the breaking of bread and to prayer. Everyone was filled with awe at the many wonders and signs performed by the apostles. All the believers were together and had everything in common. They sold property and possessions to give to anyone who had need. Every day they continued to meet together in the temple courts. They broke bread in their homes and ate together with glad and sincere hearts, praising God and enjoying the favor of all the people. And the Lord added to their number daily those who were being saved (Acts 2:42-47).
 
"Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another" (Proverbs 27:17); a verse well known to us in our men's group :-)
 
Amen.
 
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New Covenant: Compassion

Compassion is beautiful. It is when we change on our inside, love gets activated, we feel for a suffering person and want to help. 

Jesus is famous for His compassion. I see this again and again as I read my Bible. Today we admire Jesus' compassion because we are brought up to think of kindness as a virtue, but in His day a man associating with and helping women was scandalous. For a man to mix with low life was scandalous; foreigners and non-Jews, prostitutes, tax collectors and people with leprosy were considered to be beneath normal society, yet these are the people Jesus helped. It is a completely New Covenant reality.
 
In Bible times men were expected to follow societal rules: women were regarded as chattels; they could not argue with their husband, participate in religious worship or learning, or own land or vote, they were to do as they were told and stay in the background. Children were to be seen and not heard, they played no part in adult life. People of other faiths were seen as aliens and were to be avoided. Religious leaders regarded themselves as superior beings, elite, and had almost nothing to do with the common folk. And the Romans, well they were the hated enemy, the oppressors; Rome had had its boot on Israel's neck for generations.
 
Yet these are the people Jesus showed His compassion to. Time and again the people around Jesus would have been scandalised by His words and actions, He was so very counter-cultural.
 
I often wonder how it must have struck Matthew, Mark, Luke and John; to see these outlandish kindnesses from their Lord, and then to reflect that "God is love" (1 John 4:8), and "You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind", and: "You shall love your neighbor as yourself" (Matthew 22:37-40). They could see love in action from Jesus, the outworking of the "great and first commandment and the second like it" (Romans 13:10).
 
Some Favourite "Compassion" Bible Verses

• (Matthew 8:1–4) "I am willing" Jesus said to the leprous man, "be clean!"  
• (Matthew 8:5–13) Jesus healed the Roman Centurion's son.
• (Matthew 15:21–24) Jesus healed the daughter of a Canaanite, a pagan.
• (Matthew 19:14) Jesus said, "Let the little children come to me".
• (Mark 2:13–17) Levi, a tax collector, was brought into Jesus' inner circle.
• (Mark 6:34) "When Jesus landed and saw a large crowd, he had compassion on them, because they were like sheep without a shepherd".
• (Luke 7:11–17) "His heart went out" to the widow whose only son had died.
• (Luke 7:36–50) Jesus forgave "a woman in that town who lived a sinful life".
• (Luke 8:1–3) Jesus and His disciples were accompanied and supported by some devout women: this was totally counter-cultural.
• (Luke 8:42–48) Jesus was always open to people's needs, even when caring for one person, He was ready to help another.
• (Luke 8:42) Jesus went to heal the synagogue ruler's dying daughter.
• (Luke 8:43) On his way, the crowds almost crushing Him, Jesus healed "a woman who had been subject to bleeding for twelve years". She was "unclean", especially for men.
• (Luke 10:33) Jesus taught how a Samaritan came to a man who had been robbed and beaten, took pity and helped him.
• (Luke 19:10) Jesus dined with Zacchaeus a tax collector, "For the Son of Man came to seek and to save the lost".
• (John 4:1–30) Jesus shared the Kingdom of God with a Samaritan woman and transformed her worldview and life.
• (John 8:1–11) Jesus showed that no-one could condemn a woman caught in adultery.
• (John 11:35) Jesus wept when He saw the distress of Martha and Mary after Lazarus died.
 
Many people came to Jesus, they could see that He was the kind of man who would know their hurt, He would see things as they did them-self, and be willing to help (Matthew 8:3). Jesus was not simply a "soft touch", He was genuine and responded willingly.
 
Jesus did not just seek out the lost and the lowly, He would help everyone, "he drove out evil spirits with a word and healed all the sick" (Matthew 8:16); "all the sick ..". Jesus is "all" (Colossians 1:16-17) and "all in all" (1 Corinthians 15:28). In our day Jesus still seeks to help all the people and He also wants us to help. After we are saved Jesus wants us to "go" and "do the works" He has eternally planned for us (Matthew 28:19; Ephesians 2:10), these are works of help and kindness (Galatians 5:22).
 
Jesus did not exclude anyone. I know people like that, they will go to a stranger and begin to talk with them. Soon enough the person will share their troubles and my friend will be able to gently bring Jesus' light to shine on them. Such glimpses today bring Jesus' Bible times actions alive and they are so encouraging to us all.

I remember times when I too have spoken up. We used to call these times "divine encounters". I am sure that "Christ in us, the hope of glory" (Colossians 1:27), shines out from us and brings Jesus' compassion to a person. Always the other person is truly helped. When Jesus uses me, I am aglow afterwards; my lovely Lord has helped me help someone who was troubled and did not know where to turn.
 
One of our pastors, Phil, would remind us to pray and ask Jesus to give us divine encounters, to put people into our path so that He could reveal His glory by helping. We would ask that Jesus send hurting people, those suffering, in difficulty and lacking hope; people who felt that they were forgotten or overlooked or out-of-step with the world around them.
 
(Phil has now gone home and is with Jesus, he was such a lovely Christian man. He was a "natural" evangelist, where-ever he was he would start talking about Jesus to the person next to him; he always had a helpful testimony to share and a Jesus story to tell!)
 
Right now, in our own household, Trish and I are being gently reminded of our own need to be compassionate. There is a crisis housing shortage in our city. Our older daughter's landlord cut short Kate's shared lease; her share friends found new places and Kate moved in with us. This was not her choice but a sudden necessity.
 
We have moved everything out from Trish's office and given away the furniture. Trish is still working as a school teacher and often works at home. Her office was also her prayer room, her quiet place. Now we are brining in Kate and her belongings, it is a big job. Each one of us is going through our possessions and discarding everything we can, clothing, books by the hundred, music and teaching CDs, ornaments and mementos, kitchen things - everything. It is hard. Kate will have to make many adjustments in her life. She has ongoing health issues, so all of this is happening while she is unwell and low on energy.
 
Instead of living with friends in a sweet house in a funky part of the city, Kate now lives in our very ordinary suburb with her parents and her older brother. Praise Jesus we are all peaceful, we are getting along together and able to express our love towards one another. Every day Trish and I thank Jesus for His kindness and gentleness towards us, His compassion. We know His presence in our home.
 
One thing I see in Jesus; He makes no big thing of helping people, even when it is truly difficult or significant. He simply addresses the person and helps. When He is dealing with those of an "opposing spirit" (Acts 11:2 Amplified), like the Pharisees or the Jewish leaders, Jesus allows himself to fuss and speak boldly, but other times He is gentle.
 
For me, a great joy of being Christian is that I continue to grow under Jesus' influence. As a boy and young man I delighted in growing: I grew to be a six foot man, in my studies I was an above average student so could grasp ideas and see that I had the potential for a good job, and as a citizen because I was encouraged by my scout masters and the grown-ups around me. Now I am mature and am still growing because Jesus is in my life.
 

We Christians grow spiritually towards "the fullness of the stature of Christ" (Ephesians 4:13). A part of this growth is to live with an increasingly "soft heart" (Ezekiel 36:26). It is good to remember that there is an objective to all this. We are already in Jesus' inheritance, one day this will be a reality and we will truly know the glory of God. There will be no tears in Heaven. Today we have a foretaste (1 Corinthians 13:12). I find this richly satisfying.
 
Scripture seems to me to say that this glorious inheritance can be different for different people. I do not understand how this is so, (since we are all saved to the "uttermost" (Hebrews7:25)). Perhaps it is to do with our compassion towards others: "Then the King will say to those on his right, 'Come, you who are blessed by my Father; take your inheritance, the kingdom prepared for you since the creation of the world .. Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me'" (Matthew 25:34-40).
  
Trish and I are thanking Jesus for His examples of compassion towards others as we find ourselves close to a number of people with mental health issues. None of these consider their problems to be spiritual so we feel that Jesus biblical approach is not practical for us here and now. I believe Jesus is saying: "stay with this one John, and with that one too, show them My love, My acceptance. Give them practical help and encouragement. There will come a time for spiritual ministry".
 
The Bible does not talk about "mental illness" but has many instances of people with demons or under demonic attack, (Mark 6:13; Luke 10:17); I am reasonably sure we are all talking about the same kinds of trouble. Jesus always responded to such people with kindness, the Bible says He saw them with compassion, and the love of God flowed from Him.
 
So we press on. We remember how Jesus has delivered each of us from spiritual darkness. In my case it took a number of people ministering over many years before I was free. We are reminded to keep close to Jesus, by reading our Bibles (Acts 2:42), praying "without ceasing" (1 Thessalonians 5:17), and keeping short accounts with our Lord (Galatians 5:25).
 
Thank you Jesus for coming to so many of us, and to me, drawing me to yourself and introducing me to so many wonderful like-minded believers. And for continually growing me. So lovely. Amen.
 
Favourite Bible Verses
 

"I desire mercy, not sacrifice, and acknowledgment of God rather than burnt offerings" (Hosea 6:6).
 
"Praise the Lord, my soul, and forget not all his benefits - who forgives all your sins and heals all your diseases, who redeems your life from the pit and crowns you with love and compassion, who satisfies your desires with good things so that your youth is renewed like the eagle's" (Psalm 103:2-5).
 
"The Spirit of the Lord is on me, because he has anointed me to preach good news to the poor. He has sent me to proclaim freedom for the prisoners and recovery of sight for the blind, to set the oppressed, free to proclaim the year of the Lord's favor" (Luke 4:18–19, from Isaiah 61).
 
"Be still and know that I am God. I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth! The LORD of hosts is with us; the God of Jacob is our fortress" (Psalm 46:10-11).
 
"'Has God forgotten to be merciful? Has he in anger withheld his compassion?' Then I thought, "To this I will appeal: the years when the Most High stretched out his right hand" (Psalm 77:9-10).
 
"Because judgment without mercy will be shown to anyone who has not been merciful. Mercy triumphs over judgment" (James 2:13).
 
"But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law" (Galatians 5:22-23).
 
"Blessed are the merciful, for they will be shown mercy" (Matthew 5:7).
 
Amen.
 
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God Has Thoughts For You

Growing in Jesus is awesome. I find that I am often encouraged because I have been given a new and brighter view of life by Holy Spirit. The newness and brightness comes because I see that view in the light of Jesus.

Lately I have been pondering the reality that God thinks about me, about each one of us. The Bible makes it plain, over and over again, that God, who we know as Father, who has the whole Universe and billions of people to manage, thinks about me (and you) so often that David said His thoughts "would outnumber the grains of sand" (Psalm 139:18). I am able to share in King David's delight as he wrote his psalms, in knowing how God was thinking about him.
 
"Many, O Lord my God, are the wonders which You have done, and Your thoughts toward us; there is none to compare with You. If I would declare and speak of them, they would be too numerous to count" (Psalm 40:5 NASB).
 
"How precious concerning me are your thoughts, God! How vast is the sum of them!  Were I to count them, they would outnumber the grains of sand .." (Psalm 139:17-18).
 
I am writing this at our favourite camp site by the sea in our Southwest. Soon I will walk along the shore as the sun goes down, I will come away with sand all over my feet and will be thinking about God's thoughts. Just on my feet will he hundreds and hundreds of grains; how many are there on this one shore? O Lord Jesus, how wonderful!
 
This is inspiring to me, very affirming. Somehow I am assured that I belong, that I should be here, right where I am. And also that I am heading in Jesus' right direction for me, towards the ".. knowledge of the Son of God, becoming mature, attaining to the whole measure of the fullness of Christ" (Ephesians 4:13).
 
God Himself has thoughts about me, about you. Many English Bible translations use the word "plans", and the Amplified who want to be truly clear, says "thoughts and plans". God's thoughts are continuous since before we were born (Galatians 1:15). I am only just recognising this. His thoughts concerning me are not angry or judgmental thoughts about the rotten things I have done. No, He has forgiven those and they are now "behind His back" and "as far as the East is from the West away from Him".
 

"'For I know the thoughts and plans that I have for you,' declares the Lord, 'plans for welfare and not for calamity to give you a future and a hope'" (Jeremiah 29:11).
 
This is very good news. This means that all the other "not good" thoughts which come to my mind are being placed there by someone who is not God; that "someone" can only be Satan so I can immediately cast them off (2 Corinthians 10:5).
 
All this helps me to understand how God is .. He throws His shadow over us, each one, His covering, His tent, His care and thoughts and plans.
 
God is For Everybody: Even as we pray for and care for one another we are sharing in the thoughts God has for those people. We may think of the people of Israel at this time as they are being attacked by Hamas. But God's thoughts are for all the billions of people in the world, each one separately. His thoughts may be for every Israeli but at the same time God has thoughts and plans for us, and for each of the Hamas militants and those supporting them, morally or financially.
 
God's Bigness: For months I have been pondering how big God is; times like this help me see that His bigness is beyond imagining and is simply awesome, (also, they help me to know "fear of the Lord"). When we get a touch from God, when something supernatural happens which we know can only have come from Him, we know that at that very moment He is especially thinking of us. Then we realise that He will have had many thoughts for us leading up to this moment; he hasn't just helicoptered in to help now and then will fly off to help someone else. No, Jesus assures His people that He is "with you always" (Matthew 28:20), with everyone, all the time, awesome!
 
The Lord's Prayer: Now is a time when people are remembering the Lord's Prayer, I am encountering this everywhere I go. This is a collective prayer, and also Jesus teaching each one of us to pray to "Our Father". We call out to our Abba Daddy to "give us this day our daily bread", asking Him to think of us and everything we need to sustain us, "spirit, soul and body" (1 Thessalonians 5:23) as He has covenanted to do (Luke 12:22-34). The Lord's Prayer is for everybody on Planet Earth, because Father God is Father to us all, even unbelievers; He created us, each one, for His own purposes, even when we are wandering in a wilderness away from His path (Luke 1:79).
 
God's Spiritual Gifts To Help Us: Jesus wants us to share in His work on the Earth. This is spiritual work; He gives us spiritual gifts.
 
Note: You may have been taught that the spiritual gifts described in the Bible are not for today but were only for the apostolic age while the church was being formed. I have studied this teaching and find it wanting. What I find clearly stated in Scripture is this: Jesus helped many during His three ministry years on the Earth. He performed all kinds of miracles for all kinds of people as He saw our Father leading. After being crucified and rising from death Jesus told His people, (not just the disciples and later Paul), that He would soon leave them to be with our Father in Heaven and that He would send another "helper", "advocate", "comforter", God's Holy Spirit (John 14:15), to empower the believers so that they could carry on His work here and even do "greater works" than He had done (John 14:12). We are to "go into all the world" (Matthew 28:19-20) and do this, having "rivers of living water" (John 7:38) flowing from us to bring "salt" and "light" to others (Matthew 5:13-14). My understanding is that the "greater works" are possible because we are many millions in number and can minister in countless places to vast numbers of people at the same time; Jesus, in His humanity, was only at one place at any time. (See 1 Corinthians chapters 12 and 14, Hebrews 2:4 and more).
 

Here is a lovely testimony:
 
For a long time, my wife Trish and I studied under a couple who taught Jesus' spiritual gift of prophecy (1 Corinthians 12:10; 14:1,3). We were taught to listen with our spiritual ears (and an open heart), and to hear God speaking, sometimes for ourselves and more often to "strengthen, encourage and comfort" other people (1 Corinthians 14:3). The teaching couple had seen that the prophetic gifting is a theme in the Bible, but not often seen among Jesus' people in our city in our time. They sought out teaching for themselves, being careful to choose teachers whose theology and lives were clearly Bible based and centred on Jesus. The prophetic is a Holy Spirit gift, and Holy Spirit always reveals Jesus.
 
We were called the Eagle School Of The Prophetic and we all grew over those years; we saw miracles as Jesus' love and life were imparted to a great many people.
 
For several years one lively local church would hold a week of tent meetings by the river in the centre of our city. Besides the big marquee tent there were smaller ministry tents, one was for prayer for healing, another for tea, coffee and cool drinks, (we would bring home-made muffins and scones to go with people's cuppa), another may hold helpful Christian resources, mostly to be given away. Our tent was for people to come and hear what God had to say to them, their own personal word from Jesus. Trish and I were part of this ministry. We saw miracles, we saw Paul's words come to life: ".. our gospel came to you not simply with words but also with power, with the Holy Spirit and deep conviction" (1 Thessalonians 1:5).
 
One man came to us who was a surprise; he was clearly very well off, his bike would have cost thousands and his Lycra and sunglasses hundreds more. He was not Christian and told us that he did not know why he had come to our tent. We were in small teams. Sometimes the person coming to us would share their story but often they would not know what to say or to ask. This man was quiet. We all sat for a few minutes then the person whose turn it was to pray prayed a simple prayer asking Jesus to let this man know His word for him. After a brief silence one of us spoke and drew a clear word picture, then the next spoke a different picture, then the last of our trio, once again, spoke a third different picture. Immediately I saw that all three pictures for this man contained the same message: the man was much admired and had great worldly success but his personal life and his relationships were empty; all the precious things of life seemed to have passed him by; Jesus knows and understands isolation and loneliness and was ready to come alongside this man and bring him into His life and His family of believers.
 
The man cried, great deep sobs. It was so good to hug him, here was new life. This man now knew that he was in God's thoughts and His love. We passed him on to another person who was gifted in presenting Jesus' gospel and suggesting ways that people can find a suitable local church. That man left our tent with a much lighter step than when he arrived. Jesus had been love and salt and light to him by using us (Matthew 5:13-14; John 7:38).
 

That man had told us that he did not know why he had come to our tent. I believe that our Father sent him there so that He could "reveal His thoughts" to Him (Amos 4:13), and begin to give him a "full life" (John 10:10).
 
We often saw tears it that tent, and in the many other times we ministered Jesus in this way, we also saw great joy as people heard the thoughts God had for them; God was waiting until the person inclined their ear and was ready to hear. We were simply Jesus servants. Every Christian can see Jesus at work in this way: ".. with power, with the Holy Spirit and deep conviction". We were, and still are, available, we have learned from the Bible and the vast Christian literature, we listen and obey. This is very satisfying work (Ephesians 2:10), bringing God's thoughts to our neighbours and our brothers and sisters (John 13:34; Romans 13:8; Galatians 6:2).
 
Recently I was in a devotion with friends. One of us began by saying "God is truly relational", (she is a very relational person, thoughtful, kind and a great mixer). We all nodded our heads, "yes, we see the same thing" we seemed to be saying, "we all see this in our Jesus". I find it hard to make friends, even to mix in a crowd of strangers is so difficult; I see myself as being shy but also as trying to be helpful and to show Jesus' generous heart that He has given me. So I am excited about the "thoughts" verses I have been finding in my Bible; God's thoughts for us are completely part of who He is and who we are in relationship with Him. God created the Creation so that He could be relational towards something "other" and share His glory (Jude 1:24). That “other” is us, people, humankind.
 
All this encourages me to keep going, to keep walking in Jesus and continue in fellowship with His people. "Therefore, as you received Christ Jesus the Lord, so walk in Him, rooted and built up in Him and established in the faith, just as you were taught, abounding in thanksgiving" (Colossians 2:6-7 ).
 
Eternally God "is", He calls Himself "I AM" (Exodus 3:14). Father, Son and Holy Spirit are eternally loving, giving, sharing. This relationship within the Godhead is so special it has its own name, "perichoresis". Now God includes us in His love and thoughts. We are "born again" (1 Peter 1:23) into Jesus and His church where we learn to get along together, to "one another" one another, "being confident of this, that He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus" (Philippians 1:6).
 
Amen.
 
Favourite Bible Verses
 

"He who forms the mountains, who creates the wind, and who reveals His thoughts to mankind, who turns dawn to darkness, and treads on the heights of the earth - the Lord God Almighty is his name" (Amos 4:13).
 
"May our Lord Jesus Christ Himself and God our Father, who loved us and by his grace gave us eternal encouragement and good hope,  encourage your hearts and strengthen you in every good deed and word" (2 Thessalonians 2:16-17).
 
"See to it that no one takes you captive by hollow philosophy and vain deceit, according to human tradition, according to the elemental spirits of the world, and not according to Christ" (Colossians 2:8).
 
"We destroy arguments and every lofty opinion raised against the knowledge of God, and take every thought captive to obey Christ" (2 Corinthians 10:5).
 
"There are different kinds of gifts, but the same Spirit distributes them. There are different kinds of service, but the same Lord. There are different kinds of working, but in all of them and in everyone it is the same God at work. Now to each one the manifestation of the Spirit is given for the common good. To one there is given through the Spirit a message of wisdom, to another a message of knowledge by means of the same Spirit, to another faith by the same Spirit, to another gifts of healing by that one Spirit, to another miraculous powers, to another prophecy, to another distinguishing between spirits, to another speaking in different kinds of tongues, and to still another the interpretation of tongues. All these are the work of one and the same Spirit, and he distributes them to each one, just as he determines. Just as a body, though one, has many parts, but all its many parts form one body, so it is with Christ. For we were all baptized by one Spirit so as to form one body - whether Jews or Gentiles, slave or free - and we were all given the one Spirit to drink" (1 Corinthians 12:4-13).
 
"Follow the way of love and eagerly desire gifts of the Spirit, especially prophecy.  For anyone who speaks in a tongue does not speak to people but to God. Indeed, no one understands them; they utter mysteries by the Spirit.  But the one who prophesies speaks to people for their strengthening, encouraging and comfort" (1 Corinthians 14:1-3).
 
Hallelujah! Praise Jesus!
 
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What Are You Feeling?

The Dreaded Question
 

"What are you feeling?" These words were spoken by our Counseling teacher to each of the students in my Bible College class. In almost every lecture she would go round the class and stop in front of each of us and ask the dreaded question "John, what are you feeling?" I would sit there terrified. I had no idea what I was feeling and, truth be told, I did not want to know.
 
This went of for weeks and eventually we all loosened up. I know that I grew greatly from this teaching. I can now recognise and evaluate my feelings; from this I can respond, take action, cope. Also, it helps me work out appropriate boundaries.
 
Jesus Is Here To Help
 
We all have feelings all the time. As the circumstances of our lives change so do our feelings. But mostly there are many things going on in our life, each with its own set of feelings. Does this make a mixed stew of feelings, emotions and pressures within us? Yes, often.
 
What then happens? Either we blow up. Or we shut down .. Unless we are able to identify and manage all these emotions.
 
Definition: "manage": to handle or direct with a degree of skill.
 
Our inner life becomes more critical to us as our world and our life-in-the-world become more complicated, more challenged. Thankfully Jesus is here to help; He makes available skills which we can learn:
 
"Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you" (1 Peter 5:7).
 
"We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ" (2 Corinthians 10:5).
 
"Put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil's schemes" (Ephesians 6:11).
 
"Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened, and do not be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go" (Joshua 1:9).
 
"And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts - and be thankful" (Colossians 3:15).
 

In those Bible College classes I got a better understanding of what psychology and counseling hope to achieve, and also that most of those working in these fields truly want to help confused and hurt people. But even more I learned that our Creator God has designed and "fearfully made" us in "His image and likeness" (Psalms 139:14; Genesis 1:26) and that by "following His ways" (1 Peter 1:2) we will be able to live rich, "full" lives (John 10:10) in the world in our place and time.
 
"You have been chosen according to the foreknowledge of God the Father, through the sanctifying work of the Spirit, to be obedient to Jesus Christ and sprinkled with his blood: Grace and peace be yours in abundance" (1 Peter 1:2).
 
Feelings and emotions are part of life. In the 1700s J.S. Bach, who loved Jesus and wrote rich Christian music, described many of his fellow churchgoers as "careless, muddled spirits".
 
In our own modern societies, depression, anxiety and stress are epidemic.
 
Many doctors agree that a majority of patients in hospitals are there for psycho-somatic reasons, people get sick if they have not learned to deal with the emotional part of their life.
 
Anger
 
Have you noticed? Practically everybody is angry - there are so many causes - everybody can give you ten good reasons to be angry. We have to learn to live with all of them, and also to manage our anger.
 
We are:
• Angry at fast rising prices
• Angry at proven lies from governments and other leaders
• Angry at the damage to our children from school curriculums and screen time
• Angry at unreliable and uncertain financial systems
• Angry at supply chain problems
• Angry at all the advertisements everywhere
• Angry at threats to international trade
• Angry at threats of more pandemics
• Angry at threats of world wars
• Angry at the traffic
 
In particular I am shocked and angry at our seeming powerlessness before the shrinking of democracy. Our Western governments used to serve the people; this is the core of democratic rule, that the people are always more important than the government and no government person or law is more important or powerful than any citizen. Now our governments seem to follow their own ideologies without our agreement and are making us into fearful compliant servants.
 
Unforgiveness
 

Unforgiveness is also a big problem for many. Unforgiveness breeds bitterness in the one who was hurt. The person who caused the pain is often unaware of the continuing anguish and is going on with his or her life. Bitterness is a slow poison and can cripple a person; they still feel the pain of the offence and also feel anger that the offender has not been held to account. This may all be true, but our heavenly Father wants us to forgive so that we can go on.
 
Our need to forgive is important to God, it is front and centre in Jesus' teaching. Forgiveness lifts us over the barriers between our self and a righteous relationship with God.
 
Jesus taught us to pray to Our Father: "Forgive us our sins, as we also forgive those who sin against us" (Matthew 6:12).
 
He said: "For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins" (Matthew 6:14-15).
 
Woken By Jesus
 
This morning (my last for this time camping by the sea) I awoke at 4 o'clock singing this song in my heart. My felt emotion was joy:
 
Therefore the redeemed of the Lord shall return,
And come with singing unto Zion;
And everlasting joy shall be upon their head.
 
They shall obtain gladness and joy;
And sorrow and mourning shall flee away.
 
Therefore the redeemed of the Lord shall return,
And come with singing unto Zion;
And everlasting joy shall be upon their head.

(Ruth Lake, from Isaiah 51:11 KJV).

 
Remember, Jesus is here to help us. He gives us His peace (John 14:27).
 

We are "the redeemed of God" (Gal 3:13), we have been "ransomed from sin" (1 Peter 1:18-19; Revelation 5:9), "bought for a price" (1 Corinthians 6:19-20), and "set free" (Acts 13:39).
 
We are children (1 John 3:1) of Jesus' New Covenant (2 Corinthians 3:6). Israel understood their Covenant as "hesed", which in English is "lovingkindness" (175 times in the NASB) or "abounding in love" or "everlasting love".

Our New Covenant will last forever and it is always for us. God undertakes to care for us (Luke 12:22-32). We can be encouraged (Hebrews 6:18). Jesus and our Father God are bigger than the world and its troubles (Psalm 8:3–4; Luke 12:7), and our future is more wonderful than the politicians or business tycoons can imagine (Ephesians 3:20).
 
Cleaving To Jesus
 
Jesus wants us to "cleave" (cling, hold tight), to Him always; this is confirmed by many Bible writers (John 12:26, 15:1-17; Acts 11:23; Hebrews 10:39). I often remember Matthew's last thought from his Gospel, Jesus assurance: "I am with you always" (Matthew 28:20) - and so many Psalms! Jesus is right here with us, right now! In every event in our life, He has been present; Jesus is here to redeem us from everything. He will lift our spirits and bring His joy and peace as He did for the eight of the Apostles who died as Martyrs, and for so many since then. Dietrich Bonheoffer was hanged in the closing days of WWII. Bonheoffer said: "Salvation is free, but discipleship will cost you your life", he knew this to be true because he lived it.
 
Jesus told His disciples: "the one who stands firm to the end will be saved" (Matthew 24:13). I believe this may be one of our Saviour’s most profound commands to us.
 
New Testament writers use powerful language when encouraging us to keep a close relationship with Jesus, the Amplified Bible translates this as "cleave" 16 times. Those verses are among my favourites, I am encouraged and I do cleave. There are times when I hang on to Jesus with everything I have .. He always responds with love and reassurance. For such devotion to Jesus we need a clear mind (2 Timothy 1:7) and a clear heart (Psalms 24:4).
 
We are not a product of our past. Often it is past events which fuel our negative feelings and emotions. As Christians we are a product of Jesus and His completed work, "a new creation" in Jesus:
 
"Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come" (2 Corinthians 5:17).
 
".. You're done with that old life. It's like a filthy set of ill-fitting clothes you've stripped off and put in the fire. Now you're dressed in a new wardrobe. Every item of your new way of life is custom-made by the Creator, with his label on it .." (Colossians 3:9-10 Message).
 
"What Am I Feeling?"
 

"What am I feeling?" We can ask our self this question and then look to Jesus for His clarity and help.
 
One of the first Bible verses our children learned at Sunday School - then often spoke around our house: "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways know, recognize, and acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight" (Proverbs 3:5-6).
 
Remember Paul's words as he ends his letter to the Ephesians: "For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. Therefore put on the full armour of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand" (Ephesians 6:12-13).
 
We are alive in Jesus, spirit to Spirit with Him, we can stand, we can be strong and courageous, we can live life to the full. So lovely.
 
Thank you, Jesus. Amen.
 
Favourite Bible Verses
 
Our Father speaking to us about Jesus: ".. Listen to him!" (Matthew 17:5).
 
"He died for us so that, whether we are awake or asleep, we may live together with him. Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as you are doing" (1 Thessalonians 5:10-11).
 
Nehemiah praying to God about his people: "They refused to listen and failed to remember the miracles you performed among them .. But you are a forgiving God, gracious and compassionate, slow to anger and abounding in love. Therefore you did not desert them" (Nehemiah 9:17).
 
"Humble yourselves, therefore, under God's mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time. Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you. Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. Resist him, standing firm in the faith, because you know that the family of believers throughout the world is undergoing the same kind of sufferings. And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast. To him be the power for ever and ever. Amen" (1 Peter 5:6-11).
 
Jesus is with us. Hallelujah. Amen.
 
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Husbands, Love Your Wives

"Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her" (Ephesians 5:25).

"Husbands, love your wives, and do not be harsh with them" (Colossians 3:19).

Many may say "what a strange thing to talk about .. of course I love my wife, it is natural, it is why I married her".

My wife is Trish; we are long married, and the years have rolled by. Trish and I have had to face many difficulties, together and separately. Children have come along, bringing great blessings and also many complications. And there is our work, mine and hers, within and outside of our home, and also our extended family and sport and our other strong interests.

We grow and are not the same as when we were courting and newly wed. Love is different now. Isn't this true? Isn't your life together different?

"Husbands, love your wives" said Paul. The words are clear; they were written to the whole church at Ephesus and also at Colossae; Paul will have seen things which prompted him to share this thought with both groups.

I see Paul as the great discipler, he shows us who we are in Jesus - see the early chapters of Ephesians and Colossians. Then, to complete those letters, he teaches us how to grow in Jesus to realise our potential as human beings, as Christians (Ephesians 4:12-13) and as ambassadors for Jesus (2 Corinthians 5:20), and so that we can to bring salt and light (Matthew 5:13-14) to our generation (Philippians 2:15).

Like Paul I have seen things. Trish and I were "fine"; we now have grown-up children and grandchildren too. But, truth be told, things were only mostly fine, other times there was friction and dissatisfaction.

Oscar Wilde said that bigamy is when a man has too many wives, and that having just one wife is very much the same .. In the Western democracies statistics suggest that about half of all married people feel as Oscar Wilde did.

Was I heading along the path to be another statistic? I don't know. Trish is likely strong enough that she would have kept us together regardless of any foolishness I did, like running off to live alone. I never stopped loving Trish. What we have is precious, as it was when I fell in love across a room. I think that it just became a bit patchy.

Thankfully I met two men for whom these Scripture verses have come alive, men who are now my friends, who have actively responded to this godly command and have the most beautiful testimonies. Each of them, and I, have different stories, but the glorious joy and richness we have found is the same.

Testimony: My Two Friends, And Now Me Also

"Here is my wife, this person whom God gave to me, (and I truly believe this: my wife Trish was chosen for me and given to me by our loving Father God). Sometimes we became uncomfortable, at those times we seemed to no longer belong together or be fully fitted.

Even so, I knew that our separating would have a terrible impact on everyone in our family, us too. Our thousands of wonderful memories would be blighted. Family events, (and there are many every year), would be less fulsome, less happy, less complete. The children may feel that they have to take sides.

Trish and I remember when our kids would come home from school and say that such-and-such brother's and sister's parents had split up and how hurt the children were; years later the hurt is still there with the now-young-adult brother and sister making their way in the world; and the parents too, their pain is still clearly present, even after they have "moved on".

Besides, there was so much promise in Trish and my meeting and marrying, surely this was not a false promise?

And there is God's Word:

"May your fountain be blessed, and may you rejoice in the wife of your youth" (Proverbs 5:18, see also Malachi 2:15).

"He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the Lord" (Proverbs 18:22).

"In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself" (Ephesians 5:28).

My testimony continues: "I thought that I could take this on as a project for Jesus (and for my wife and me). What do Paul's words mean? What is the "love" he talks about? How and what will I need to change? What do I need to give up? And for how long?"

Both my friend's testimonies, and my own, tell that we learned that "love" is a doing word; love requires thought, commitment and sacrifice, indeed everything we admire in Jesus points to how we should love our wife (Ephesians 5:25). Just as Jesus always prayed before He acted, we learned that prayer was an essential part of our "work" in re-growing our marriages. And, the relationships between men and women are not simply physical and emotional, they are also spiritual, we had to learn to give more fully from our spirit too.

Marriage was never primarily for the husband and wife, and it is not "all about love" (which implies that if we can no longer feel the love, the marriage is over). No, marriage is primarily for the children, so that they grow strong and loving and balanced in a healthy, stable environment, and also for our society, that it too is a stable, healthy environment. This is why, in every country, marriage has been made part of the civil law. Marriage is so important to every society that we protect and encourage it for the betterment of all.

I was intrigued to note that, in our Bibles, wives are not instructed to love their husbands. My researches show that this is because men and women are different. Men must make a conscious effort to take their focus off their work and other interests, and deliberately care for their wife, while women will respond to true, practical love with love! Women are instructed: "However .. the wife must respect her husband" (Ephesians 5:33). Observation shows me that unless we husbands earn that respect, I believe we are unlikely to receive very much at all.

When I set out to grow in loving Trish, one of the first things I learned was to bite my tongue, to be less free with my comments and criticisms of Trish and her ways (James 3:5, 1 Peter  3:10). This was hard. It still is. Over the years I had become like Henry Higgins in "My Fair Lady", thinking "why can't a woman be more like a man?" Trish, like Eliza Doolittle, is not a man, praise Jesus, and, like all of us, was carefully hand-made by God our Father to be herself; and this I needed to learn again, how to treasure and respect her unique person and her woman-ness.

Another thing. These changes in me would not happen overnight. We three men learned that the necessary changes would be difficult and that we would have to call on our Christian training for guidance. Also we would have to break old habits and learn new ones (this I believe takes about 40 days, a timespan known to Jesus Himself): "train yourself to be godly .. godliness has value for all things, holding promise for both the present life and the life to come" (1 Timothy 4:7-8). I realised that loving my wife God's way would be costly, it would be me who would need to change so it would be costly to me.

In my career as a computer database specialist, I was involved in some important cutting-edge projects, I became a hot-shot and loved my work; but that was then. Now I no longer do paid work, my life is small and I have come to love that. I pray for the whole world, but day-to-day I live among my immediate family and a handful of small prayer groups. People with big lives seem to have all the big problems associated with the big things they are involved in; they may have too little time or energy for the truly big things in their lives, those things involving their relationships with family and the people close to them.

When we study God and the Cosmos, we see that God is most focused on relationships, firstly within the Godhead of Father, Son and Spirit and their eternal loving, sharing relationship, and then with us, His created people, the only creatures created in God's image and likeness (Genesis 1:26), and the only creatures with a spirit (Genesis 2:7; 1 Thessalonians 5:23), just like "God who is spirit" (John 4:24).

We can relate to God spirit to spirit. The whole Bible is about this special relationship between God and humankind (Matthew 22:37), a relationship where God's precious Son will marry a spotless bride (Ephesians 5:27), us Christians, and we will see and know His glory (Isaiah 60:2).

The Creation of physical things and all life was created on God's spoken word in six days. In the fullness of time this Creation will have served its purpose and "be rolled up like an old garment" (Hebrews 1:10), then God will bring forth "a new heaven and a new earth, where righteousness dwells" (2 Peter 3:13; Revelation 21:1). The Creation is vast to us and we all wonder at its beauty. Scientists have been studying it since the earliest days and still have many questions. The Creation is not a closed system. To God it is secondary to us people and our relationship with Him, including our marriages, these are all designed to last eternally. Hallelujah!

Trish’s and my marriage had sometimes lost some of its joy and flavour and vitality, but it did not so much need rescuing as reviving, happily it was far from dead.

We can find many lists of the most important elements of human life, none include "being divorced" or "being unhappy in marriage". Here is a list I made when reflecting on the past two or three years of our marriage:

• Listening
• Commitment
• Cleanliness
• Generosity
• Humility
• Contentment

"Listening" comes first, I think this was Trish's greatest unmet need from me, she is very relational (Trish is not strong with physics or numbers, while I am). People respond to her amazingly, (it was the same with my mother!) and she can make any plant grow and bloom! I needed simply to listen. I studied "active listening", it is a skill, easy to learn but quite hard to do.

"Commitment" speaks for itself .. I am often reminded that my greatest good will come from a great marriage, so, I am looking out for me, not just "us". Yes, I am committed!

"Cleanliness” may be obvious. I am not a dirty person but some of my untidy habits ("O, surely that pile of books is fine") really upset Trish who is a lovely homemaker, so I try to improve in those things .. inside and out, on myself and around about our household.

"Generosity" is something Jesus loves. I pray about giving and have learned to go beyond tithing and be free and relaxed about it, and now with myself towards Trish too.

"Humility" is a Jesus hallmark. He was the one who left His glorious life in Heaven to come and become a servant to all (Mark 9:12; Luke 9:22) and then die for us (Romans 5:8) and rise again (1 Corinthians 15:3-7). Besides, as Christians we are expected to "one another" one another, our wife is our best place to start: (Philippians 2:3-4; Matthew 22:35-40).

"Contentment" is lovely: we are told to "grow where you are planted" and "be grateful in all things". "Godliness with contentment is great gain" (1 Timothy 6:6), so true. Trish and I volunteer at "The Garden of Hope" where many of the people are recovering addicts, the amount of gratitude seen there is awesome and inspirational. I now have Jesus' peace (John 14:27) and am content .. I think that this is what the Bible calls "shalom".

"Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful" (Colossians 3:15).

So I have been working at all this for a good while now, it is not a burden and has mostly become second nature. Our marriage is really good. 

Trish and I, and our whole family, are facing some big challenges but we are facing them together with peace, joy and love in our hearts. 

Both Trish and I know and love Jesus, and we have one another truly and fully in our covenant marriage. Thank you Jesus. Hallelujah!

Simple But Poignant Quotes

"The greatest gift a father can give his children is to love their mother". From Theodore Hesburgh.

"And as ridiculous as it may sound, sometimes all any of us needs in life is for someone to hold our hand and walk next to us". James Frey.

Favourite Scripture Verses

"Keep looking to Jesus the founder and perfecter of our faith" (Hebrews 12:2).

"Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant  or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful;  it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth.  Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.  Love never ends" (1 Corinthians 13:4-8a).

"His divine power has given us everything we need for a godly life" (2 Peter 1:3).

"So encourage one another and help one another to grow stronger in faith, just as you are already doing" (1 Thessalonians 5:11).

Thank you Jesus. Amen.

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